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I am a wife, daughter, mother, bilingual teacher, poet, author, women's Bible study teacher, world traveler, orphan advocate, and an adoptive mother.  Our adoption journey has been filled with a lot of hurt and loss, along with even more hope, grace, and healing.  Through it we have experienced more of God than we ever bargained for and have watched Him miraculously redeem our story when we surrendered all the broken pieces to Him.

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Surviving the Valley Series
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Monday, October 7, 2013

Current parenting challenge

We are finding many parenting challenges every day, as you can imagine.  However, our current challenge right now is in teaching humility.  We walk a fine line with our newest "child" in this area.  This is not a child that was raised with all of the love and support he needed during the early years of his life.  He did not grow up with a healthy sense of self worth.  Yet somehow he came to us with a pretty "high" self-esteem, thinking quite highly of himself at all times.  Part of that is his age, I'm sure, no different than most 15 year olds.  Part of it is cultural--being a Latin male (I don't mean to stereotype, but I'm hearing that one quite often especially from my Latin friends).  Another part of it could be due to being raised by psychologists, rather than a family. 

He has this little ritual that I caught him doing the other day.  I'm sure it's something he learned to do through one of the psychologists that met with him over the last several years.  He looked in the mirror in the car, addressed himself, and started telling himself everything that he's good at.  When I asked what he was doing, he said he was lifting his self-esteem.  Then he pulled down the mirror in front of me and told me to do the same. 

I immediately put the mirror back up and told him I don't need a mirror or self talk to help me feel good about myself.  If I'm ever feeling down, all I need to do is open up my Bible and let God's truths speak to me.  All I need to do is open my Bible to see what God has to say about me, to hear that I'm beautiful, I'm loved, and I'm cherished. 

It's tough.  It's hard to tell a child that came from a hard place that he thinks a little too highly of himself.  Yet as a parent, it's also hard to let it go when you know that others around him will be turned off by such an arrogant spirit.  They won't get it and won't understand where it's coming from. 

We model as much as we can, and I ask God for wisdom more than anything else. 

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