I'm pretty pumped about the Guatemala side of our trip.
Then we head to Spain, and to be completely honest, that part has me a bit anxious and nervous, quite terrified at times. If I went into it, I could fill the rest of this page with a long list of things that are gripping me wth fear over this trip. Traveling so far and for so long without Mike and David is probably my biggest fear. Leaving while my dad is still recovering from his brain injury and then a blood clot has me very anxious. Not knowing what to expect financially for our excursions within the country, especially in the first month of having to start paying for Juan's college education, makes me nervous, even though I know we have all we need. Knowing I will have to speak in Spanish and struggle through a particular verb tense and accent only found in Spain wears me out just thinking about it. Then add all my mixed emotion about seeing Laura again myself, and you could say I'm a bit freaked out.
This is what I prayed for when we started searching for Laura two years ago. Now here we are, just a few days from leaving, and I am overwhelmed that it's actually happening. I am deeply saddened that Julian cannot join us, but I am satisfied with the agreement the airline finally made with me so I didn't just lose the funds entirely. At least it's one less issue to cause me anxiety. Someday, I sure hope to see all three of them reunite, but this just isn't supposed to be that time. Like Julian himself told me, you can't force something to happen if it isn't God's will.
I've got to remember God's plans are not my plans, His ways are not my ways, but He always has a plan that is bringing him glory.