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I am a wife, daughter, mother, bilingual teacher, poet, author, women's Bible study teacher, world traveler, orphan advocate, and an adoptive mother.  Our adoption journey has been filled with a lot of hurt and loss, along with even more hope, grace, and healing.  Through it we have experienced more of God than we ever bargained for and have watched Him miraculously redeem our story when we surrendered all the broken pieces to Him.

Surviving the Valley Series

Surviving the Valley Series
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Thursday, June 29, 2017

Nine days

My friend flew to Guatemala today to spend time with her family and friends in her home country. She goes almost every year, and I've often wished for the chance to go with her sometime. I may not have gone with her this year, but I am still in denial that I'll actually be following her in just nine days. Wow. Nine days from now, I'll be in Guatemala, meeting with my team, getting ready for a full week of ministry. And who knows? I might even get to see my friend! Whether I see her or not, I still think it's pretty neat that we'll be there "together". 

I'm pretty pumped about the Guatemala side of our trip. 

Then we head to Spain, and to be completely honest, that part has me a bit anxious and nervous, quite terrified at times. If I went into it, I could fill the rest of this page with a long list of things that are gripping me wth fear over this trip. Traveling so far and for so long without Mike and David is probably my biggest fear. Leaving while my dad is still recovering from his brain injury and then a blood clot has me very anxious. Not knowing what to expect financially for our excursions within the country, especially in the first month of having to start paying for Juan's college education, makes me nervous, even though I know we have all we need. Knowing I will have to speak in Spanish and struggle through a particular verb tense and accent only found in Spain wears me out just thinking about it. Then add all my mixed emotion about seeing Laura again myself, and you could say I'm a bit freaked out. 

This is what I prayed for when we started searching for Laura two years ago. Now here we are, just a few days from leaving, and I am overwhelmed that it's actually happening. I am deeply saddened that Julian cannot join us, but I am satisfied with the agreement the airline finally made with me so I didn't just lose the funds entirely. At least it's one less issue to cause me anxiety. Someday, I sure hope to see all three of them reunite, but this just isn't supposed to be that time. Like Julian himself told me, you can't force something to happen if it isn't God's will.

I've got to remember God's plans are not my plans, His ways are not my ways, but He always has a plan that is bringing him glory. 

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