My last night of Writer's group

 I joined my Writer's group about ten years ago, thinking I already knew a ton about writing. Ha. Did I ever have a thing or two (or everything) to learn. I am eternally grateful for them, for all I learned, for the amazing connections I made there, and for the amazing friendships. 

To top the night off, not only did I get to see my sweet friend, Regina Stone Matthews, again just one day after she came to my school, but I had another friend join me at the last minute. My friend, Charlotte, used to teach with me at Bullock before she retired a few years ago. She's been writing some life lessons on facebook over the last two or three years that have always inspired and challenged me, but recently her posts have taken on a more devotional tone. I asked her if she was collecting them somewhere for a possible devotional some day, and she commented that she'd love to get together and chat about that sometime this summer. We set up a date next week, and in my mind, I'd already decided that my biggest advice would be to check out the Rockwall Christian Writer's Group. When I realized that this was probably my last one to go to, I asked her at the very last minute if she'd like to join me--and she did! I think she went away pretty inspired. No better way to close a chapter than to pass it on to someone else to step into. 

I took two poems to share of things that have been occupying my heart quite a bit but I've had trouble putting into words. Mary DeMuth commented that she always loved reading my poems and that she was glad I brought them last night to share. That meant a lot to me to hear her say that. She's a lot like me in that sometimes poetry is the only way to really express certain emotions and make sense of them. At the end, she gifted me a little pack of her Scripture cards that I'd actually been wanting to purchase. I will treasure them, as I treasure everything I've learned from her.

I’ll Do My Part

A school year is ending

We pack up our things

We empty the walls

We tie up loose strings

We send home awards 

Affirm each girl and boy

We cherish the memories

Reminisce all the joy.

But this year felt different

As we ended the day

Knowing they had the luxury

To go back home today.

In two classrooms in Texas

They did just the same.

They awarded their kids

And then terror came. 

A perfect storm brewed

While a lonely young man

With pure evil in his heart

Carried out a heinous plan.

A plan of destruction

One could never imagine

In a safe little town where

Many haven’t even been.

First they blamed a teacher

For a propped open door

They’ll also blame a system

Saying security was poor.

They blame the police

For cowardly waiting too long

To rescue those poor children

On the day it all went wrong.

They blame the government

For not passing better laws

They blame the family

Making poor parenting the cause.

So many things went wrong

That could have gone awry that day

So many fingers to point

Saying someone needs to pay.

I look at the shooter

And I wonder inside

Why did he drop out of school

And in isolation hide?

Are there students in my classroom

Who need to know I see

There’s a hurt down inside,

A person they don’t want to be?

Have I affirmed them enough

Have I made them feel secure?

Have I helped them find courage

To face a problem and endure?

In situations like this

With so many people to blame

We can each do our small part

To keep it from happening again.

We can open our eyes

And reach out with compassion

Use our sphere of influence

To put God’s love into action.

My heart still aches on

For families of those who slipped away

Whose kids did not come home

On that unspeakable day.

I think about those children

In the middle of the night

I envision all those teachers

Putting up a frantic fight. 

I listen to their stories

And try to understand their pain

They’re on my mind so much

With hopes they didn’t die in vain.

I lock my doors more often

I teach more vigilantly.

But now I look more deeply,

To make sure each child feels seen. 

There really are no answers

But I commit to do my part

To see with Jesus’ eyes

And to love with Jesus’ heart. 

If I stay inside my bubble

And play the finger pointing game

I might not connect with someone

And then also be to blame.