DBU Take Two

This has been such a crazy, busy week that these pics seem much older than just 8 days. 

Eight days ago, Juan came back from Pine Cove with his roommate, and I picked him up mid-morning near Fort Worth. 

 First things first, a MUCH needed haircut.

 We went home for him to shower before taking him out shopping for some new school clothes and other necessities for the year ahead at DBU. However, he started his laundry and fell asleep for the rest of the afternoon. That boy was truly exhausted. I managed to get all of his laundry done for him before we headed to church that evening.

 Sure was nice to have him back at church with me! In fact, we all were together for the service for the first time in a long time. I've missed that. 

 Afterward we ate dinner as a family for the second time all summer, along with some friends that came, too.

The next morning, we made it out shopping in record time, stocking him up on new clothes, shoes, apartment necessities, and a few groceries. I gave him a list of simple foods to have on hand to make simple meals, I gave him a budget, I made him use his calculator as he shopped to make sure he didn't go over, and I gave him cash to pay for it all, explaining how much he'll be able to spend on his food each month. He actually really enjoyed "adulting" for the morning. 

After that, we met my parents for lunch before heading home for a few hours for him to pack everything up again. 

Early that evening, we got him all moved in to his new apartment on the DBU campus that he will be sharing with four other guys, three of whom had been there for the last few weeks/months while he was at Pine Cove.  I didn't take pictures of the inside because, well, it was definitely an all guys apartment. Enough said.

 This beautiful little park/fitness trail is practically right in front of his apartment. 

 He's not at DBU by accident. God has a purpose for him there, and despite several setbacks his first year due to some immaturity issues, poor self-management skills, and a definite lack of English that became quite evident pretty quickly, (and a very humbling second semester trying to swim back to shore), he improved just enough to keep his funding for a second try this year. 

I saw him grow and mature in many ways during his summer at Pine Cove, so I am hoping that those skills and that maturity will help him start off much stronger this year. I suppose we'll have to just take things one semester at a time and not get ahead of ourselves in planning out his life. If I've learned anything since meeting him ten years ago, it's that his life is in God's hands, not mine, and I need to trust God with my son on a daily basis. 

I miss him around here. David and I have had a really sweet summer together, but there is always that feeling that someone is missing. And the sad reality is that I think he's going to be missing more often than not from here on out. 

Juan and I have a very close relationship, one that seems to get closer the more independent he becomes. My role has changed from parenting and modeling to now coaching, guiding, and encouraging. His love language is Words of Affirmation, so I am constantly looking for ways to praise him, encourage him, and lift him up--as well as looking for times to just say, "I'm proud of you, son." I'm learning that those words of affirmation go a long way with him. A lot further than any bit of nagging and reminding him of his shortcomings would go. 

I guess it's just like practicing gratitude, intentionally focusing on the good rather than dwelling on the negative. Makes a huge difference in all areas of life. 

So, as much as I miss my son, I'm so thankful for his summer experience working and serving at Pine Cove, I'm thankful for his first year at DBU, and I'm thankful for how God reopened the door for him to go back to DBU this semester. I used to fret over the fact that our four years with him were just not enough time to prepare him. But now I see that God said, "That's right. They weren't. But I've still got him in MY hands and have continued to surround him with just the right people and environments that he needs to continue growing into the man he's supposed to become."

Just like He told me after the adoption failed, "Trust Me with him. I love him even more than you do."