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I am a wife, daughter, mother, bilingual teacher, poet, author, women's Bible study teacher, world traveler, orphan advocate, and an adoptive mother.  Our adoption journey has been filled with a lot of hurt and loss, along with even more hope, grace, and healing.  Through it we have experienced more of God than we ever bargained for and have watched Him miraculously redeem our story when we surrendered all the broken pieces to Him.

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Surviving the Valley Series
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Sunday, March 5, 2017

My head is spinning

My head is spinning with so many thoughts and emotions right now.

Six weeks ago today, I woke up feeling overwhelmed and anxious. I hate feeling that way, so I decided to start taking my thoughts captive and making them obedient to Christ. I literally made a list of every anxious thought and lifted my notebook up as I prayed over every single thing on my list.

The hardest thing about Juan's senior year is that you have so many decisions that need to be made far in advance, decisions I wasn't ready to be making so early in the year. I thought we'd have more time to get through this year, yet March just barely started, and he's already registered for freshman orientation in college! I am more than grateful for how God led him to DBU and how He's guided every single step, but still, making all these decisions so early in the school year has not been easy as neither of us really seemed ready.

On top of college decisions, scholarship applications, and regular senior year stuff (ordering a cap and gown, graduation announcements, etc.), we still both carried a huge dream in our hearts, wondering if it might actually come true. Would this summer be the year that God would reunite him with his sister?

That very morning, six weeks ago today, I cried out to God  in my prayer time. "Take us to Spain, God. Please take us to Spain."

Just a few short hours later, Juan woke up and checked his phone to find a message from his sister asking to talk via Skype. God took our faces and our voices to Spain that day via a video call. As we popped up on a video in her home in Spain, she popped up on a video here, filling our home with her sweet voice once again after eight years of silence. That voice has continued to fill our home almost once every week or so since while she and Juan David talk for over an hour each time.

The first Skype call gave Juan David the chance to meet his sister's mom. The second led to them telling him we could stay with them if we ever came to Spain. Today, he gave her mom specific dates that we're considering to make sure our hopeful plans don't overlap something they may already have planned. A few hours later, we talked to our leader for our Guatemala mission trip to see about getting only one-way tickets for the two of us so that we can travel directly to Spain from Guatemala after the mission trip. My head is spinning just thinking about it--everything is happening so quickly!!!!! I hate making quick decisions, especially big ones, but sometimes when God says go, you put your seatbelt on and go!

This morning during my prayer time, I read this quote on today's prayer (from the book The Prayer that Changes Everything by Stormie Omartian). One I've read so many times before, but it stood out to me very boldly today.

 "Thank you for giving me the courage to go forward and fulfill the destiny you have for me."

About the same time, I heard my phone vibrate. When I looked down, I saw his sister had posted a picture on social media. A picture I recently sent to her of the two of them together nine years ago, the one I used so often when I told people about our plans to adopt them. She wrote, "When we were young. I love him so much."

How can I not go forward to reunite them? It's not my story. It's their story. Their destiny.

Guess I better get started with my fundraising for our Guatemala trip so I still have the money to purchase tickets to Spain. My ultimate dream would be to purchase a ticket for Julian to join us. If that's really God's plan, I know He'll make a way.

Like I already said at least twice now, my head is spinning. In a good way.

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