Waiting

Okay.  I think I get it now.  I get why I wasn't "allowed" to teach the Esther study last semester.  It wasn't time.  Whether I thought it was just the right time or not, it wasn't.  If I thought last week's session spoke directly to me, this one pretty much had my name written all over it.  Last week was all about facing our fears, knowing that God is with us, no matter what.  Even if the thing you fear the most actually happens.  This week is all about waiting.

The main quote/concept I took away from the session is this:  When we're always waiting on a specific event or person or action, we will always lose heart.  But when we're waiting on God, we will mount up with wings like eagles.  We will run and not grow weary.  We will walk and not faint.  When we're waiting on God, our strength WILL be RENEWED!

I'd like to think that God did not reopen our adoption case only for it to close again.  I'd like to think that God would not have reunited us with "Juan" and given all of us a new hope only for it to come crashing down again.  I'd like to lay claim to faith that we will be able to go to him soon and that we will be able to finally bring him home as our adoptive son.  I'd like to think that all is going to go well.  But all I know and am laying claim to is that God is still writing our story and that He is orchestrating something greater than our minds can fathom or understand.

Therefore, my hope is in HIM, in the confidence I have in His purpose for all involved.  Waiting on a specific result will only drive me a little more insane each day as I wait for it.  Waiting on HIM frees me to be confident that He is continuing to work out His purposes in me, Mike, David, and both boys.  I hate waiting, but maybe that's because I've been waiting on the wrong thing all this time.